UTIs after sex are clearly very common, yet for some reason, people tend not to talk about it much. So I thought, why don’t I help get the conversation rolling?
I promise it’s a good story, but if you’re not up for a read right now, jump to the bottom to see my general tips and more on the products I use to prevent UTIs after sex.
Story Quick Links
- UTIs After Sex – When It Really Kicked In. >>>>
- Should My Partner Be Tested For UTI? >>>>
- Antibiotics Didn’t Stop The UTIs After Sex. >>>>
- The Day I Had A UTI Related Run-In With The Police. >>>>
- What I’ve Learned About UTIs After Sex. >>>>
I distinctly remember my first UTI. It was an isolated incident that happened long before my year of hell that saw me through nine or ten. I like to think of it as the time when I was gloriously unaware that UTIs after sex were really a thing.
I had a boyfriend who worked nights so finding moments to shag could be difficult. On this occasion we had sex three times at intervals during the night and I was basically asleep – that type of dreamy, warm copulation that is closely followed by more slumber.
Needless to say, I did not bother going to the toilet. No Sir, it was straight back to sleep for me.
“The next day I awoke busting to pee, but upon urination found that I was still BUSTING! So uncomfortable, and so weird.”
I went straight to the doctor, he informed me I had contracted a UTI due to my failure to clear my urethra of bacteria after sex.
Ok got it.
UTIs after sex prevention tip 1: Always pee immediately after sex.
After sharing this advice, my doctor then issued me with a single pill.
It was like some wondrous, fairytale magic. That was that, no blood, no more discomfort – just done and dusted.
UTIs After Sex – When It Really Kicked In
Years later all was forgotten, including my shift working boyfriend, and I found myself in another relationship with a man who could literally go for hours.
We’re brought up to believe this is the ultimate quality in a lover but apparently excessive friction coupled with a short and narrow urethra does not equate to the best sex of your life – to the contrary this was arguably the worst year of my life.
“I began to realise that every time I had sex, I would get another UTI. UTIs after sex had officially become my modus operandi and post coital intimacy had been replaced by me sitting on a toilet trying to force a decent stream of urine from my body.”
I couldn’t help but wonder why it was happening in this relationship and not others? I’d been in long term relationships and had never had this ongoing problem.
Was my boyfriend carrying bacteria that was reinfecting me each time we had sex? Was something happening in my own body that was causing some kind of imbalance in my urinary tract?
Should My Partner Be Tested For UTI?
I’ve since learned that it is indeed possible for bacteria to be passed back and forth between partners during sex. If you think about it, that makes perfect sense – this is exactly how STIs occur, so why not other organisms?
If I knew this at the time, I would have considered whether my partner should have been tested. For males this can mean both urine and semen tests, as bacteria can reside in the urinary tract and/or the prostate.
It’s entirely possible for males to carry bacteria without experiencing symptoms, so they wouldn’t necessarily know they were contributing to your own symptoms. Same sex partners can of course pass organisms back and forth too – that’s one area that is truly equal.
UTIs after sex prevention tip 2: Consider whether your partner should also be tested.
Strangely, my boyfriend’s housemate also began to experience recurrent UTIs. That got me thinking about the environment in their share house, or their drinking water or possibly my boyfriend’s fidelity! It seemed like way too much of a coincidence for this to be happening to both of us at the same time.
Learn more about UTI and sex and getting your partner tested in our expert video series.
Antibiotics Didn’t Stop The UTIs After Sex
I was blasting through UTI after UTI and countless courses of antibiotics, resulting in an eventual prescription for prophylactic antibiotics to be taken twice a day for two months, just in case…
“UTIs must follow Murphy’s law because goddamn is there ever a worse time to get one than when they turn up? ‘Hi, it’s me! I thought I’d drop by. I know it’s 11pm on a Sunday night before a public holiday but I just had to come!’.”
During this year of my life they came in blood splattered, painful waves as I went from after hours doctor to after hours doctor, trying to work out WTF was going on!?
I never presented any UTI symptoms when I actually saw my regular doctor which resulted in every urine culture test coming back negative.
This was probably due to the fact that the testing lab was only open during normal business hours – by which time I had already taken antibiotics.
UTIs after sex prevention tip 3: If you are likely to need to provide a urine sample, try not to take antibiotics first, as they can render your urine sterile (according to standard culture). You can either keep a sterile container at home or choose to grit your teeth and wait it out until you can get to a doctor.
Now I know how inaccurate urine tests can be. I would have pushed for better testing had I known then.
My own doctor assured me that women “just got them.”
I became “that person” – Googling and Googling, and trying absolutely EVERYTHING. Spoonfuls of cream of tartar, tea made from cornsilk, cranberries coming out my wazoo and nothing… No relief, no end in sight, just stress, while the weight dropped off me.
The Day I Had A UTI Related Run-In With The Police
I’m sure the weight thing sounds good to some, but this was extreme. I had given up sugar due to it being a Life Coach to bacteria, and I was literally climbing the walls.
“I was afraid, terrified that there was no escape and most definitely no definitive answer to why the hell this was happening. Would I suffer from UTIs after sex for the rest of my life?”
I was eventually referred to a urologist who told me he’d take a look inside my bladder to see if anything else was happening (a cystoscopy).
He also told me that after the procedure many women never have another UTI, as the camera can enlarge the urethra, thereby not allowing it to further clog with nasty bacteria. (It turns out this is just a theory, without any hard evidence to back it up). Thanks Urologist!
UTIs after sex prevention tip 4: It would appear that diet can play a part for many people with recurrent UTI. Sugary processed food and drinks. So an unhealthy diet might need to be addressed.
Yay, I thought, as I felt another infection rear its ugly head as I sat in his office. He also told me that his wife drank aloe vera juice (packed with sugar in its readily available form) to sooth the inflamed area. I should have known this was not the answer!
At this stage I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at the ridiculousness of it all. I wondered whether he usually gave his patients this kind of advice, and whether I should have just spoken to his wife directly.
UTI Antibiotics And Escaping Arrest
I left with a prescription for prophylactic antibiotics, tears in my eyes and a searing pain in my crotch… Running to the chemist, desperate to fill the script, desperate to pee, desperate to see the end and find a cure.
“As I clawed my antibiotics from their foil wrappers, clutching my bottle of sickly sweet aloe juice, I was questioned by police. Clearly they saw the desperation in my eyes, my weight loss and a persona of anything less than stable. I was a junkie, an antibiotic junkie.”
Between the prophylactic antibiotics, the invasive bladder inspection and the breakup of my relationship, my UTIs after sex stopped, for a time, for a time…
I have had one since, years after sex had stopped causing me anxiety. And yes, it was late in the evening the night before a public holiday in my slightly provincial home town.
The eye roll I gave the pharmacist who suggested Ural, a urinary alkalinizer, has actually gone down in history. I nearly pulled a muscle in both optic nerves.
I’d just had sex with a new partner. This reinforced my own newly developed theory that there are some men that I am just not compatible with on some basic biological, bacterial level. Swipe left, move along, body says no.
UTIs After Sex Are Worse Than Using The Toilet Around A New Partner
They sometimes refer to UTIs as “honeymooners syndrome”. Historically women became sexually active on their honeymoons.
There was probably already a mixture of fear and trepidation. Then add the potential embarrassment of showing your new husband that you needed to use the toilet. That may have been enough to leave many new brides with a desperately full bladder and bacterial growth flourishing.
New relationships encounter these same problems too. In this last instance the toilet was next to the bedroom and the door did not close. So I was less than enthusiastic about issuing the powerful jet of urine that might have saved me.
And it’s not just not peeing after sex that can cause problems. It turns out it’s about poo too! Constipation is linked to recurrent UTIs, especially in kids.
So if you’re also not making regular bowel movements due to the awkwardness of a new relationship, it’s best to just get over it.
UTIs after sex prevention tip 5: It’s important to avoid constipation. Keeping bowel movements regular can help with urinary tract health.
What I’ve Learned About UTIs After Sex
Fortunately for me, I now know a lot more about UTIs after sex, thanks to the diligent and constant study and questioning of this website.
The last time it happened I immediately recognised what was happening. I was uncomfortable but I managed to flush it out before it developed into the splatter fest, recurring carnage of my previous experiences.
My Tips For Avoiding UTIs After Sex:
- Wash your hands before any sexual activity (hands are germ sanctuaries) and ask your partner to do the same.
- Shower before sex, and ask your partner to do the same, if you find this helps.
- Oral sex can transfer organisms just as any other sexual contact can – I’m still experimenting with different approaches here.
- Always pee immediately after sex to help flush your urinary tract.
- Try using condoms, I find latex-free condoms are the best option.
- If the issue seems specific to sex, consider whether your partner should also be tested, and don’t ignore the possibility of STIs – they can cause UTI-like symptoms.
- Don’t let yourself get constipated! This can cause a world of UTI problems.
- Take a look at your health in general. Maybe your diet isn’t helping.
- Stay hydrated! And pee regularly!
How I Avoid UTIs After Sex
I’ve found that using certain products consistently has helped me avoid further UTIs after sex. For me, the most important have been:
- pH balanced wash that I use instead of ordinary soap
- pH balanced lubricant for use during sex
- A natural antimicrobial that can be taken after sex to help prevent UTI. (You need to create an account to view this one).
- A high quality D-mannose before or after sex
- A probiotic designed for urinary tract health that I take regularly
- A vaginal suppository probiotic (you put this directly in the vagina, where it counts most)
- And a few other items. I worked with the team at Femologist to make a bundle of my favourite products. So you can check those out there.
Specific products aren’t usually covered on this site because it’s about UTI science. But because UTIs after sex is such a widespread issue, and because these products are about prevention, I was allowed to share the links.
You can also provide your name and email address in the green box at the end of my story, for more information about my top picks.
Advocate For Yourself. You Know Your Body Best.
If there was one other thing I’d pass on to other sufferers of UTIs after sex, or recurrent UTIs in general, it’s this: Don’t accept it when you’re told it’s just the way you are, or when you’re offered remedies you don’t believe have validity.
Do your own research and keep track of your symptoms. Consider whether your partner may be contributing to the issue. And think about whether it makes sense for both of you to be tested.
Start with some of the resources on this website:
- Why your UTI test is negative despite your symptoms
- Chronic vs. recurrent UTI
- Recurrent UTI treatment options
UTIs after sex are so incredibly common. It would have been great to learn more about them during sex ed at school. Imagine if everyone fully understood the role sex can play in the UTI department?
Then peeing after sex would just be the norm. And maybe then we wouldn’t be terrified when we experience that first UTI. Maybe we’d have some idea how to handle it, and so would our partners.
You can request more information by providing your name and email address in the green box below.
Comments
Hello I’m a 56 year old lady who had a hysterectomy thirteen years ago but the last three years I keep getting UTIs , I eat berries and have soya milk to drink and have flax seeds every day on my cereal , I try to eat healthy and never smoked or drink alcohol. I drink five to six pints of water a day plus herbal teas, I’m on nitrofaurtion low dose but when I come off them I get another infection, I’ve tried topical hrt but when it gets in my system I get faint and nearly pass out and dizzy spells so now I’m at a loss what to do, I’m afraid to have sex with my lovely husband and I’m under a urologist but he says it’s my Estrogen level, I’m scared that I will be on antibiotics forever or worse bladder cancer, please can you advise me I’m so fed up , many thanks.
Hi Mandy, I just sent you an email with links to some resources that I hope you find helpful. Melissa
The way I got rid of my UTI /I am post menopausal also. It was difficult. I fasted immediately for periods of time. No food until late afternoon. During this time I drank Linden berry tea that had cooled. I used the actual leaves from the countryside. I then took lactobaccillus pills, ate fermented pickles, sour kraur, vit. c., hemp seeds ground myself and goat yogurt and loads of diluted cranberry and pomegranate juice. At the end of 2 to 3 weeks, I took collodial silver 30ppm *tsp in 8 ounces of water with all the fermented food. It left slowly but surely! I am staying on the fermented food train because it also gave me loads of energy.
Hi Laura, it’s great to hear you found something that worked for you! Melissa
I was just diagnosed with pelvic prolapse. Which aggravates my tendency to get UTIs I think. Trying physical therapy for the prolapse. The E-String estrogen causes pelvic pain and had a reaction to the estrogen cream. Are there natural bioidentical estrogens that can help?
Hi Jan, we have heard from a handful of people that switching to a different cream has helped, however, it’s always best to speak with your clinician about alternatives. Melissa
What about estrogen dominance?
Hi Catherine, that is a really great question. As far as we know there hasn’t been any work done regarding estrogen dominance and the microbiome. We’ll certainly keep an eye out for new research in this space and let you know if we find anything! Susy
My urologist would like me to start Hiprex for frequent UTI’s. I am skeptical about drug as heard it turns urine to formaldehyde? Any comments about this drug?
Hi Jean, it is true that Hiprex goes through a process that forms formaldehyde in the urine, and that this contributes to its known antimicrobial properties. Hiprex is commonly used as part of one long term treatment protocol utilised in the UK. I just sent you an email with some notes on this. I hope it helps. Melissa
Hi
I am post menopausal, have BV and IC with a high PH in my vagina. My IC symptoms are lower abdominal pain and severe urethral burning. I am due to do the urine broth test next month to check for embedded bacteria . I have discussed oestrogen therapy with my specialist ( Dr Anderson, I live in the UK) who has said it is my choice whether to start this before the broth test. I am very unsure what to do first, oestrogen or treatment for bacteria, if found ? Any thoughts ?
Thanks very much
Susan
What an EXCEPTIONAL piece of work! Thank you for your time and great efforts!
Thank you! 🙂
Hi Susan, I just sent you an email as I’m not sure if you’re receiving comment notifications. Melissa
I am using estriol/ovestin cream. How long can I use it and can I use it everyday? I have been having recurrent UTIs. Thanks
Hi Rose, the studies linked to above indicate that its use should be safe for most people but it’s best to speak with your prescribing doctor about this. Melissa
I suffer from recurring UTIs. My question is: how long can I safely continue using Hormone therapy if I apply it daily
Hi Mary, that’s a great question. I have added it to our list for the experts. We share expert insights by email whenever we can. If you’d like to join our mailing list so you can stay informed, you can sign up here. Melissa
I have at least a 15 year history of recurrent uti’s and have tried everything. The only long periods without infection have been when I am on a long term low dose antibiotic but as soon as I stop the uti’s return. I am currently on macrobid which my ob feels is safe because it mainly effects the bladder and not the whole body. I am also on Premarin applied to the urethra. I have been feeling great the past few months but read that low dose antibiotics have bad effects over time. Can you comment on this strategy?
I have been on macrobid and always get a bout of colitis while I am on it
Hi Pat, we do hear from some people that antibiotics cause digestive issues for them, however it varies from person to person, so it’s best to work with a practitioner through your options. If you’re looking for a practitioner, send us a direct message with your location and we can share some names. Susy
Hi Nita, as we aren’t clinicians we can’t comment specifically on a strategy, but we have covered the research into prophylactic antibiotic use here, if you’d like to read more. Melissa
I had recurrent UTIs for about 3 years after menopause. I started using Premarin vaginal estrogen cream and haven’t had a UTI since. It’s been at least four years since my last one. My question is, how long can I safely continue? I’m going to be turning 60 in a couple months. If I eventually stop using the HRT will the UTIs return? I’m not sure I could live through that again. I was getting them every 3 months, almost like clockwork. But, I don’t want to put my long term health in jeopardy.
Hi Marie, as mentioned in the article, it does appear that use of topical estrogen is safe for the majority of people, however, it’s always best to discuss with a doctor. The link shared above leads to a systematic review of research into the use of vaginal estrogen, so it has a lot of helpful information. Melissa
Thank you, Melissa!
I’m desperate for help, these reoccurring UTI’s are taking over my life and making me miserable constantly. I’ll take an antibiotic, feel good and then it’s back again, try another regimen of antibiotics and back. Sometimes I’ll go for a routine checkup and won’t have symptoms but a uti shows up anyways. I’ve had a bladder lift 10 years ago. I’m 51 and have been in menopause for a while.
Hi Michelle, I sent you an email with some information. You might also like to read our article about recurrent vs. chronic UTI, if you haven’t already. Melissa
I am wondering of any more holistic ways to treat infections. Currently with a bad bug Klebsella Pneumonae.. I have been on and off abx this year which I feel has killed my gut.. Looking for hope… also of any success stories with the use of tge Urmune vaccine
Hi Shannon, we aren’t aware of how the Uromune vaccine can be accessed in the US. If you have information on that can you please let us know by direct message? Many people will be interested. We have heard some success stories with the vaccine from Europe. I saw you also sent us an email so I’ve replied there with more information. Melissa
Hi,
Thanks so much for the great article. Since menopause I unfortunately suffer from UTIs, mostly after intercourse. I try to stay away from antibiotics and use D mannose which helps me quite a bit. I’m wondering if probiotic pills would also be helpful as a preventative measure?
Hi Ruth, research indicates that certain strains of probiotics may be beneficial and that these strains may be different for pre- and post-menopause. We’ve covered this in more detail and you can read more here. Melissa
The estrogen cream was terrible for me. I’d completed menopause almost twenty years previously. After using the estrogen cream for about ten days my vulva swelled up like a cauliflower, causing horrible pain. It took well over two weeks after I stopped the cream for it to return to normal. For a week I could actually feel my uterus, as if I had resumed menstrual cramps. I think maybe it would work better in women who still had estrogen in their systems.
I’ve e had utis throughout my life. I have been through breast cancer in last year which put me into menopause. I am taking tamoxifen for next 5 years. As my oestrogen levels deplete i am experiencing constant pressure on my bladder that often leads to utis. The samples sent to lab often come back negative but i am given antibiotics anyway and it feels like an infection. I am taking vaginal oestrogen but this doesn’t seem to make any difference to getting infections. I dont want to face a future with this its debilitating and i worry about becoming resistant to antibiotics. I would love to hear about your regime… I take d-mannose tablets too
Hi Emma, can you send me a direct message and let me know where you’re based so I can email you relevant information? Thanks! Melissa
My.mother is suffering from recurrent utis..its not curing..we have done everything..and now my mother is antibiotic sensitive..my mother have e.coli..which is not eliminating..if someone have sure shot solution plz plz plz rply me..its very imp for the life of my mom..plz helo
Hi Singh, there is no sure shot solution but I hope we can share information that will help. I just sent you an email. If you don’t see it, please check your spam folder. Melissa
Hi Tobi, sorry to hear you experienced that! I also got your direct message so I’ve replied by email with more information. Melissa
I’m new to utis. I’ve gone through 3 courses of antibiotics and it has come back again. I’m nervous about this. Any advice would be appreciated. I think I’m very close to menopause.
I’ve suffered with UTI since a teenager. I always get given antibiotics but they always say no bacteria. I’ve been clear for a good few years now but had a UTI in December. Thought it had cleared and had another beginning of June. Had antibiotics but gp said culture was clear. I take probiotics and gp has agreed to use vaginal oestrogen. I am on day ,8 of the initial two week dose. It was all good until today when my symptoms returned. I’m hoping it’s just a glitch
Hi Sharon, if you haven’t already, you might like to read our information on why UTI test results could be negative, even when you have a UTI. Melissa
Hi Kimberly, can you send us a direct message and let us know where you’re based, so we can share any appropriate resources via email? Melissa
My doctor had me on estrogen but stop it when I was still getting UTI’s even on the estorgen
vagifem vaginal suppository twice weekly seems to keep the utis under control. However switching to generic form did not work!
Hi Ellen, that’s great to hear you’ve found something that works for you. If you have any questions, you can always reach out directly. Melissa
I use estrogen pessaries twice a week but am suffering with recurrent UTIs. This has gone on for nearly 3 years since I had a bladder repair following VVF after hysterectomy. Urologist wants me to try Hiprex for 6 months. Does anyone have any experience of this medication? Also I was told I had painful bladder syndrome but urologist now wants to do cystoscopy under GA to rule this out. I’m so fed up. I just want to be symptom free!
Hi Liz, I just emailed you some information about Hiprex. I hope it helps. Melissa
I am new to this UTI issue, and the fact you went 4 years is beyond crazy. It all started with UTI symptoms urgency, pain, burning, and a horrible yeasty smell urine. No blood in the UTI. I want to my Gyno Dr. My apt was fine pee in cup get Pap test. But when I was leaving he did not give me a prescription for a UTI he said the dipstick did not show one but they were sending out to lab. I should take OTC AZO drug that causes your pee to be bright orange. This did not work. I finally called the Dr office back after 2 weeks and they said I did have an infection they called in a prescription. Sulfa but it was only oddly a 5 day prescription which seemed very short. It worked but came back I called my Dr to get more medicine. The tinge of UTI still lingers and burning.
Hi Heather, I see you also sent us a direct message so I’ve replied there. Melissa
Hi Dena, I hope you can find another solution. I see you also sent us an email and we’ve shared some more info there. Melissa
D-Mannose used to stop a bout of cystitis if I took it early enough. But now I’ve read that there might be side effects.
Hi Xenia, we’ve covered D-mannose in more detail here, if you’d like to read further information about it. Melissa
This article makes perfect sense to me. I have been supplementing with probiotics on a daily basis for many years now but it’s been a couple of months since I started getting flatulence so I included kombucha and enzymes in my diet thinking that i might have dysbiosis due to antibiotics that I’d taken for cystitis. I had been using Estradiol 25mcg 3 times a week for a couple of years then the doctor reduced it to 10mcg 3x a week and I noticed discomfort during intercourse. I had no idea that this could be related to more bouts of cystitis.
Hi Xenia, we hear from a lot people with similar experiences that have found estrogen cream helpful. It’s clear that we need more research into this area! Melissa
WOW. I have no history of UTIs and suddenly got one that I cannot get rid of. The bacteria that continuously coming back is enterococcus faecalis and it will not eradicate!!! I’ve been on 5 different rounds of antibiotics all of which it was supposed be sensitive to but it remains and my symptoms persist. Strangely, this happened two months after I got off my birth control pill that I had been on for years! Any advice for me? My husband and I were wanting to start a family but now… I feel I have to wait until I get healthy but the likelihood feels like it is slipping away…
Hi Lizzy, can you send us a direct message with this information and let us know where you’re based? Melissa
Great info here. What is the opinion on Utiva? Thank you.
Hi Sarah, we don’t provide information about specific products, though we do have some info about cranberry for UTI, which I believe Utiva is based on. Melissa
I used estrogen suppositories to soften the tissues of my Urethra, but found it to difficult to keep up with, so my doctor prescribed eString which is inserted and left inside the urethra. Could not decide whether that was helping much, but it had a bad effect on my mammograms, so I was told to remove the eString. I haven’t gone back to it, and want nothing more to do with estrogen.
Hi Emily, thanks for sharing your experience. More research is definitely needed into recurrent UTI treatment approaches and who they may or may not be suitable for. Melissa
Great article. Thank you! Could this apply to women with PCOS also?
Can having the Marina(I think that’s how you spell it !) coil fitted for menapausal problems be a cause of a U T I ?
Hi June, we haven’t seen any research into this, but we have received similar questions from others who are speculating whether it may be linked to symptoms they are experiencing. If you have any other questions, you can always get in touch directly. Melissa
Hi Antonia, that’s an excellent question. I haven’t seen any studies specifically linking this, so I’ve added it to our list of questions to ask an expert. Given the hormonal link to recurrent UTI, it seems plausible. Melissa
What is the role of testosterone treatment
( small daily dose of cream) in relation to UTI for post menopausal & naturethroid women /patients?!!
Hi Cathy, we don’t yet have any information regarding testosterone treatment for UTI. If you have any useful resources we can start looking into, can you send us a direct message? Thanks, Melissa
As always very informative and in a format that is understood,thank you
Can you tell me the differences with compounded estriol cream and the regular estrogen creams like estrace? I’m being treated for e faecalis and citrobacter in urine with antibiotics. Suffered with painful bladder syndrome for 7 years. Also given compounded estriol( I’ve had breast cancer) the estriol is weaker, I’ve been told so may take 3 months to work. My oncologist also told me about a new product Imvexxy which has a lower estrogen content than estrace and premarin. Obviously considering my history I want the lowest estrogen possible but still need it to work. Any thoughts? Thanks
Hi Lesley, that’s a great question and I’ve added it to our list for the experts. We share their answers periodically via our mailing list. If you’d like to join the list, you can do so above, at the bottom of the article. If you have any other questions, feel free to send them to us directly. Melissa
Hi Maria, thanks for your positive feedback! Melissa
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